What You Missed: This Week in Pop

Jersey Shore star Snooki finally confirmed that she is pregnant by boyfriend Jionni. While many are questioning the two’s parenting abilities, everybody seems to have forgotten Nicole’s strong maternal instincts toward stuffed animal Crocadilly.

Lindsay Lohan hosted Saturday Night Live in what can surely only be the beginning of the young starlet’s comeback. Although she flubbed her lines several times, cast SNL cast members praised her performance. In an attest to LiLo’s star power, the most recent SNL, on which Jonah Hill hosted, marked a significant drop in ratings. Lohan also changed the color of her hair back to the famous red. The fire crotch is back!

Mad Men’s Jon Hamm went on a mini-tirade against the “fucking idiots” Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton, who both happen to be more famous and richer than the cable star. Do I sense a little bit of jealousy, Don Draper? Maybe a sex tape is in order.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie are just like us! They go to McDonald’s and try to block the paparazzo’s cameras with their SUV’s sun visors. Oh, to be famous.

Madonna will not be promoting her new album, MDNA, because obviously it’s already a huge hit! Oh wait, except that it isn’t. At least her Super Bowl performance was a hit! Oh wait…it wasn’t.

And finally, Taylor Swift is richer than all of us, claiming the top spot of Billboard’s Top 40 Money Makers by making $35.7 million last year. In comparison, Katy Perry pulled in $12 million and Rihanna made a surprisingly low $7.7 million.

Alex Hughes is a sophomore at Sarah Lawrence. He was born in the Bible Belt and works as an editorial assistant at The Faster Times. You can follow him on Twitter @TheAlexHughes.

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