And then, QVC has Sleaze Week, a week to celebrate safe sex with annual events such as a porn marathon and a Sleaze Ball; or, as I like to call it, an excuse to show up in nothing but underwear and get fucked by grinding all night long and having make-out sessions and one-night stands back in the dorms. While it is a great idea to constantly promote safe sex, this is not the way to do it. Instead, Sleaze Week is constantly serving our huge appetite for the lack of sexual activity we get.
The Phoenix, this year, started a sex column. Why is it needed? I think a school newspaper having a sex column is embarrassing. It shows that they had nothing else to write on other than the random shenanigans of someone’s sex life. And then there is the regular dorm life. Look, we have all heard stories of being sexiled, but here, I have experienced more instances of beds shaking the floor above my dorm or having a suitemate had sex and I could hear it all night. It is not fun listening to someone else’s pleasure. It makes me feel jealous. I am still a virgin. I have not enjoyed this lifestyle as many other students have on this campus. The constant references to sex on campus makes me think I am never good enough for at least a one-night stand, especially when it appears that this kind of action happens everywhere. Also, it is just downright disgusting. No one else needs to hear your beautiful night under the sheets, on top of the sheets, standing up against the wall, in the shower, or wherever you like to have sex.
On top of that, there was that awkward moment where the Q&A for the annual “Lube It Up?” talk turned to how to find humanitarian porn? Are we that obsessed that we turn to porn and masturbation for gratification? YES! Even I have to confess that I do this. But our openness has led to a little too much information. Sex is supposed to be special, not something you throw out as a wanted need. Our need for sex right now is too much. Because you feel lonely doesn’t give you the right to go straight to sex.
When you agreed to attend SLC, you are committing yourself to this lifestyle. We are expected to spend most of our time on individual work, but our loneliness doesn’t deserve to be spent on things like sex, alcohol, or drugs. Next time you think about having sex, think about what you really need before becoming a member of this schoolwide addiction.
The views and opinions expressed here are the author’s alone and do not reflect the opinion of SLCSpeaks. If you don’t agree with them, consider submitting to the Unpopular Opinion contest, firstname.lastname@example.org.
Submitted by: Sam Felmus